Down and Safe: Part 2

A rather large pair of feet dominated the console, haphazardly plopped up on highly sensitive controls. A large clear box with flashing lights sat on the one side of the console, a half empty bottle of green liquid sat on the opposite side. A loud snoring could be heard emanating from the owner of the feet.

"Teleport Complete.", the clear box informed.

Vila woke with a start, nearly falling out of his chair. In doing so he managed to tip the bottle onto the console, which erupted into sparks and smoke.

"Moronic computer! Throw you out the airlock, that's what I should do!", Vila cursed Orac.

"Agent Mulder, FBI. If you don't mind I have a few questions I'd like to ask you.", Mulder spoke as he stepped of the teleport pad, badge held outward.

Vila slowly turned to face Mulder, only now realizing what Orac had said to wake him from his slumber. "What? Federation Board of Industry? Look, it wasn't me. It was a setup, I'm an innocent....", Vila started to say.

Mulder quickly cut him off, "I think you're confused. FBI, Federal Bureau of Investigation. I'm not accusing you of anything , I just have a few questions."

"Ohh, sure, sure, go right ahead. Wouldn't want to stand in the way of an investigation. Where'd you get the teleport bracelet? Hey, wait a minute, how'd you get Orac to bring you up here? I'm confused.", Vila spouted.

"Confusion is a constant state of mind with Vila.", Avon said as he strode into the teleport room. His gun was out and pointed at Mulder. "I see you've met the Vilage idiot, now if you wouldn't mind explaining how you got here?", Avon inquired.

Mulder, unfazed by all this, explained, "I received ,anonymously, a package containing this." He held indicated the teleport bracelet. "When I had it analyzed I discovered a receiver and intercepted some of your transmissions. It's my belief that you are intentionally using some form of time-travel technology to manipulate the stock market for your own ends.", Mulder finished.

Avon grinned. "I'm afraid you're badly overestimating our technology Mr. Mulder. We're not stuck in this miserable time by choice. The Liberator was sucked into a wormhole which somehow flung us back in time, it promptly closed after us, and here we are."

"The Liberator? We're on a UFO?", Mulder asked. It was his turn to be confused. He was seldom so wrong about his hunches.

Avon , walked over to the teleport console and quickly examined it. "I'm not sure what a UFO is, but you are not on Earth Mr, Mulder, you are in orbit around it in a spaceship we call the Liberator. You are also lucky that the Liberator has built in defense mechanisms against liquid spills. Had this been a federation cruiser, you'd have ceased to exist the minute Vila spilled his drink on the console.", Avon said as he double checked the status of various teleport controls.

Mulder shook off the initial shock of being wrong and looked at his surroundings a bit more carefully. He couldn't quite make himself believe he was on a spaceship. The corridor walls leading from the teleport room looked very poorly made, in addition the teleport console's controls looked rather primitive. But then again, the computer and ship design could be simply what was fashionable in the time these people came from, he reminded himself.

Avon spoke, snapping Mulder out of his thoughts. "I don't suppose you know anything about time travel or temporal mechanics?"

"Unless you have a TARDIS handy, I really couldn't be of any help.", Mulder said, cracking a small smile at his own joke.

Avon didn't get it. He strode quickly up to Mulder and held the energy weapon under his chin. He spoke rapidly, "I'm afraid we don't have a TARDIS here Mr. Mulder, but perhaps you'd be kind enough to let us know where we can get one, and how it works?"

Mulder couldn't help himself, he started to laugh. Avon didn't have time for this. He backhanded Mulder. Much to his surprise, Mulder crumpled to the ground, apparently unconscious.